Flowers for my Mother-In-Law

The kids are back in school and Hubs is at work. The opportunity to go on a long walk alone presented itself this morning and I grabbed it. It's no secret that some of my best ideas and solutions pop into my head during the morning hours. As I walk, problems work themselves out and joys are reminisced.

It has been a little sad around our household lately. There is a sense of moodiness, uncertainties, loss. I feel it, Hubs feels it, tears spring into my eyes as I write about it now. I miss my Mother-In-Law and my husband misses his mom.

Maxine passed away quite suddenly on August 30, 2002. We wonder where the 5 years has gone - has it really been 5 years? She had just celebrated her 68th birthday and her 40th Anniversary. All of her children and grandchildren (except one) were there for the party and a week later she was gone.

Our sadness is not easily shared with the rest of the family due to distance and other factors. We share our mutual sadness together, my husband and I. We will be traveling to put flowers on her grave later this month and as I walked this morning, thoughts of what was so special about her flooded my mind:

1. Her 'cackle' of a laugh: I rarely hear a laugh like hers, but it always makes me smile when I do

2. Acceptance of 'my' kids: She immediately accepted them as her own and always treated/loved them the same

3. She was a little girl at heart

4. She laughed at jokes even when she didn't 'get' them

5. The way she would disappear at night and return minutes later with a treat-for me-just because

6. How she gave every other sister-in-law a job after dinner, but told me to sit and talk with her over coffee

7. How much we had in common and how little everyone else recognized it

8. Her appreciation of me taking care of her son and making him happy

9. How much we just enjoyed and appreciated the time spent together

10. Her ability to grow things - anything

11. The way she loved her whole family

12. Her calling and asking to talk to me instead of my husband

13. The way she would gently take the 2lb box of Godiva's I got her every Christmas and put them away 'for later'

Placing the flowers is strictly symbolic, we both know she isn't really there. Yet, we feel her all around us all of the time...oh, how I miss her- sigh!